Hiking near Crater Lake, Spring 2004
Dave and I are no longer married, but we continue to share Jake and Sara. This means our Venn Diagrams will continue to overlap. I'm good with that, because in those instances, the event should be about Jake and Sara, and not about Dave or Me.
Dave, sadly, seems painfully awkward in those brief encounters. I am truly sorry for that. A few weekends ago, we both saw Jake perform in his Senior Thesis Project, a play called The Woman in Black. I had three members of my large extended Seattle Family with me, and Sara. Dave had thought he'd see the matinee, because we were scheduled for the 7:00 show. He must have changed his mind, or forgotten. He also attended the 7:00 show. I'd sure love to get to the point where we are both comfortable around each other.
In January, we had a similar encounter at another family event in Portland. Dave came late; I was already there. He stayed 10 minutes, made polite excuses, and left. That event led me to a night-long reflection, starting with fury and ending in forgiveness. And a poem:
Thanks Giving – a poem of divorce
I looked deeply into your eyes, looking for me
and recoiled when I saw the person that you see.
How did this happen? How did your mirror of my soul
grow so cracked and ugly? A funhouse distortion.
If this is whom you see, then how can I blame you
forus ending this way, true love un-true.
Take care, my husband, as you travel your own road;
I release you from our ever-after bond
and watch with pride the gift of our life’s work –
as two children, grown, walk ahead of us
into the sunrise of a new day.
Be safe, my friend, I treasure our long years
tedium, crisis, laughter and joy, pain and tears.
When we come around again, may we meet again
wiser and kinder, different yet the same …
with unbroken mirrors reflecting true
a stronger me and a gentler you.
Dave, sadly, seems painfully awkward in those brief encounters. I am truly sorry for that. A few weekends ago, we both saw Jake perform in his Senior Thesis Project, a play called The Woman in Black. I had three members of my large extended Seattle Family with me, and Sara. Dave had thought he'd see the matinee, because we were scheduled for the 7:00 show. He must have changed his mind, or forgotten. He also attended the 7:00 show. I'd sure love to get to the point where we are both comfortable around each other.
In January, we had a similar encounter at another family event in Portland. Dave came late; I was already there. He stayed 10 minutes, made polite excuses, and left. That event led me to a night-long reflection, starting with fury and ending in forgiveness. And a poem:
Thanks Giving – a poem of divorce
I looked deeply into your eyes, looking for me
and recoiled when I saw the person that you see.
How did this happen? How did your mirror of my soul
grow so cracked and ugly? A funhouse distortion.
If this is whom you see, then how can I blame you
for
Take care, my husband, as you travel your own road;
I release you from our ever-after bond
and watch with pride the gift of our life’s work –
as two children, grown, walk ahead of us
into the sunrise of a new day.
Be safe, my friend, I treasure our long years
tedium, crisis, laughter and joy, pain and tears.
When we come around again, may we meet again
wiser and kinder, different yet the same …
with unbroken mirrors reflecting true
a stronger me and a gentler you.
No comments:
Post a Comment